Like you guys I also have problems, here are a couple of simple rules that I follow:
- I don’t pursue long-distance relationships: Although ‘staying local’ drastically reduces the available number of possible dates, my odds of being scammed are also greatly reduced.
- I never reveal any deep personal data to someone until I meet them face-to-face and develop a level of trust.
- I use search engines to check out any possible dates, including uploading their photo on a reverse search engine such as google image reverse.
- I’m immediately suspicious if someone wants to start communicating through IM or e-mail within a very short time of meeting them on a dating site.
- I pay attention to the language someone uses. I feel sorry for those who are genuine but if their written English is poor, that’s a big red flag waving away. And although I have dated soldiers, someone who claims to be a lonely soldier in a war zone, or just back from one, is also a red flag.
- And this last rule is a very important rule – especially for you guys. Don’t fall for the sob story! You guys are trying to show an affiliation with transgender people and the issues we face, this makes it easy to lay an ever-so-sad-sob-story onto you and scam you for your hard-earned money. Yes, the issues of discrimination, poverty, homelessness and employment are real, but being scammed by believing you are paying to make our lives better isn’t a great outcome for you or us. If you really want to show your support for the rights of trans-people to exist and live in a world without discrimination, harassment, isolation and violence be an advocate and continue to love and care for us for who we are because doing this means way, way more us.
I have found that scammers are just as common on paid and unpaid dating sites, so regardless of which dating site you are using have fun and stay safe in your dating life.