I’m just wondering what trans-attracted men’s opinions are here. I understand that no two guys are going to have the same take, but I guess I’d like to hear what the consensus is.
My basic “dilemma” is that, while no one can really “tell” that I’m trans at this point, I’m not comfortable with hiding that part of myself from a potential boyfriend. There are reasons other than bigotry that someone might not want to date a trans person, and there’s no way to hide my “past” anyway.
Ironically enough, it feels like being “passable” and open about my status decreases the number of men who might be interested in me in that way.
For example, a frequent question from men I meet online is “Are you top or versatile?” I guess I was a bit ignorant here, but I always assumed “I date men” meant “I could not be ‘top’ or ‘versatile.’” Which just goes to show you that even trans people don’t know every aspect of every trans issue. Besides, I’m just about to be post-op, which makes the question moot anyway.
My plan is to continue dating men I meet on trans-specific sites. I might put up a profile on a site that’s not trans-specific, but I’ll still be honest about my past and so on. I figure that between trans-attracted men who are fine with a trans woman whose sexuality is basically hetero-female and men who haven’t dated trans women before but are open to the possibility, I should be able to meet someone.
What do you think? Am I overthinking this? Or does my plan sound like the way to go?
Thanks, and I hope everyone is doing well!